I forgot my fork

Today I forgot my fork. So i'm eating a damned salad with my fingers. No salad dressing though. Woa, what an idiot i'd look like if i had salad dressing. My employer would probably reconsider why he hired me. Then again, eating a salad of-and-in-itself is punishable by death in this place.

Some people call it rabbit food. I'm vegitarian. I call it, lunch.
I have been known to eat co-workers though. so i'm actually and co-workervor-itarian.

I made that up.
If you use that word you have to pay... Out the butt.
It's called royalty.
Then maybe I can afford Salad Dressing