Long Winters Nap
I went snowboarding Tuesday Night.
New resort, new boots, borrowed snowboard and Co-workers.
It was my second time EVER. Never been off the "Bunny Hill" before then.
I had a blast and yes, I did get hurt. Not bad though. Well, bad enough.
I took a few nasty spills and managed to slam my head off the packed snow a few times.
Needless to say my body is sore. Mostly my arms and neck.
The guys I went with have been a lot more than me. I have to say I did pretty well despite my first few times of sliding on my ass down the hill.
I got to the top of my first run of the night.
It was quite scary for a person used to a mild slope. I think the fact that I was with other guys who had done this so frequently gave me balls through osmosis. I was nervous for about 10 seconds. One of the many things I've learned from Kung Fu is that if you give in to nervousness you WILL fuck up. I pushed the lump in my throat down to my crotch and started down the hill.
I took it relatively slow. Remember this was my 2nd time out and I still had yet to feel comfortable with turning (the direction) right.
I pride myself in the fact that I can pickup something by watching. After a few runs of watching the other two guys and I started understanding how to turn right by shifting my weight and my back foot. We moved on to a more difficult hill. More Difficult = faster and bumpier. Two things that don't mix for me being new.
Great. More nervousness. Not as much this time.
I did it again.
And again.
And again.
Gradually I got better and better throughout this beautiful night of falling crystals of stinging pleasure. I didn't have to think about it much anymore. Unless I was going 40 miles an hour, getting a little loose on steering and heading into the woods. That's when I would forget which way to move my back foot.
Then.
I got cocky.
Yep. I decided to try to jump.
First it was just a slow, leisurely pickup the feet and switch them.
That wasn't too hard. Yeah, I fell but I got used to it.
Then, as I went faster, I tried bunny hops. Just jump and lift up both feet and land. Not really that hard.
So far, so good.
Then there was "The God Jump".
I sped down the hill going 70 and, behold, I see the jump to end all jumps.
This thing had to be at least 9 feet high and 3 feet long.
I grunted loudly, "I can take it!" and smacked myself on the loins.
I slowed down because I'm not totally stupid.
I hit this fucking thing WAY faster than I thought I did.
I leaned back, bent my legs and said my prayers.
I landed on my ass pretty freaking hard and stopped, dead. My head snapped back, smashed it off the ice and lost my hat. Ouch.
I hear one of the guys scream, "THAT WAS FUCKING COOL! ".
I yelled back, "YOU THINK SO? TRY IT!". Yep,you jerk, that was cold weather sarcasm.
I got my hat and got up, brushed my body and my ego off then looked back at “Mr.God Jump”.
Turns out, the damn thing was 2 feet wide by about 2 feet high. More like “Mr. I Suck” Jump. Child’s play to a bicycle or someone who can actually snowboard.
My head hurt but I was a cool snowboarder for the first time ever.
Yeah, you try to jump. I. won't. ever. again.
New resort, new boots, borrowed snowboard and Co-workers.
It was my second time EVER. Never been off the "Bunny Hill" before then.
I had a blast and yes, I did get hurt. Not bad though. Well, bad enough.
I took a few nasty spills and managed to slam my head off the packed snow a few times.
Needless to say my body is sore. Mostly my arms and neck.
The guys I went with have been a lot more than me. I have to say I did pretty well despite my first few times of sliding on my ass down the hill.
I got to the top of my first run of the night.
It was quite scary for a person used to a mild slope. I think the fact that I was with other guys who had done this so frequently gave me balls through osmosis. I was nervous for about 10 seconds. One of the many things I've learned from Kung Fu is that if you give in to nervousness you WILL fuck up. I pushed the lump in my throat down to my crotch and started down the hill.
I took it relatively slow. Remember this was my 2nd time out and I still had yet to feel comfortable with turning (the direction) right.
I pride myself in the fact that I can pickup something by watching. After a few runs of watching the other two guys and I started understanding how to turn right by shifting my weight and my back foot. We moved on to a more difficult hill. More Difficult = faster and bumpier. Two things that don't mix for me being new.
Great. More nervousness. Not as much this time.
I did it again.
And again.
And again.
Gradually I got better and better throughout this beautiful night of falling crystals of stinging pleasure. I didn't have to think about it much anymore. Unless I was going 40 miles an hour, getting a little loose on steering and heading into the woods. That's when I would forget which way to move my back foot.
Then.
I got cocky.
Yep. I decided to try to jump.
First it was just a slow, leisurely pickup the feet and switch them.
That wasn't too hard. Yeah, I fell but I got used to it.
Then, as I went faster, I tried bunny hops. Just jump and lift up both feet and land. Not really that hard.
So far, so good.
Then there was "The God Jump".
I sped down the hill going 70 and, behold, I see the jump to end all jumps.
This thing had to be at least 9 feet high and 3 feet long.
I grunted loudly, "I can take it!" and smacked myself on the loins.
I slowed down because I'm not totally stupid.
I hit this fucking thing WAY faster than I thought I did.
I leaned back, bent my legs and said my prayers.
I landed on my ass pretty freaking hard and stopped, dead. My head snapped back, smashed it off the ice and lost my hat. Ouch.
I hear one of the guys scream, "THAT WAS FUCKING COOL! ".
I yelled back, "YOU THINK SO? TRY IT!". Yep,you jerk, that was cold weather sarcasm.
I got my hat and got up, brushed my body and my ego off then looked back at “Mr.God Jump”.
Turns out, the damn thing was 2 feet wide by about 2 feet high. More like “Mr. I Suck” Jump. Child’s play to a bicycle or someone who can actually snowboard.
My head hurt but I was a cool snowboarder for the first time ever.
Yeah, you try to jump. I. won't. ever. again.
5 Comments:
Don't give up. You can do it. All night long.
No wonder you're in pain! Ouch!
Great story. I feel your pain.
Well not really but I liked the story.
Wow, that is mucho cool. Maybe you'll have a small scar, you're "snowboarding scar". That would be awesome. I could bang my head against a wall or something and tell people it was from snowboarding. It just wouldn't be the same.
I guess I just hit the next level of coolness.
Time to skydive.
Ok, maybe not.
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